It's going to be HILARIOUS one day when I do come out to my mother, and explain to her that I started coming out to people when I was 17, and that she is probably the last person to know. She will be so shocked, and she will wonder why I didn't have enough confidence in her to confide in her my "deepest darkest secret."
I will nod, and smile, and explain to her that it certainly isn't a deep dark secret. No, in fact, it's not a secret at all. I tell people, and if they can't handle it then I can't handle them, and so much for that relationship. However, I DO need a mother. It's not like I have another parent in the event that this parent were to abandon me (even though I am an adult, being rejected by my one and only parent would be extremely painful).
She may be appauled that I didn't try to hide this little factoid from the public. She may be mortified to find out that all of my best friends' parents know, understand, and really don't care.
No matter how she handles this new knowledge, the question will come to her mind and spill out of her mouth, "Why didn't you tell me sooner? You can trust me, and I will always love you."
I know this, and I know she will love me no matter what.
I will cite the time I told her that one of my best male friends from home is gay. She quickly responded with "He doesn't really know, none of you know at your age (I was probably 16 at the time)," and continued to believe that he was just "experimenting" and hung around with all of us girls because he secretly wanted to be close to us and being gay was the only way to get close to us. She will deny that, but in her heart she will know what she did.
Then I tell her about what she did today. We were floating around the pool, in the sun, since it is extremely hot. I decided to tell her the reason why my friend disappeared off the face of the earth over a year ago (see the blog post from a day or two ago). She compared my friend to my other gay friend, thinking it was a comical comparison. No compassion at all for the fact that a boy who was barely 16 at the time was kicked out of his house, told her was a hateful sinner, and forced to fend for himself. She thought it was joke worthy.
And that's why I won't tell her until I'm out of college, until I'm financially independant. I am mortified by the fact that she finds something like that even remotely funny. How dare she. How dare she.
Saturday, June 28, 2008
Friday, June 27, 2008
Disney, You Never Cease to Make me Proud
I've been going to Disney World since I was 4 years old. I still remember (well, probably more like I can envision it and therefore believe I can remember) seeing Cinderella Castle peeking over the trees and how excited we all were to be in the happiest place on earth. From that moment on we were addicted, and have been going to Disney World religiously ever since. I think it was probably my father's favorite, for various reasons. He loved seeing how happy it made me as a child, but Disney is a lot of fun for the big kids too. And my daddy was definetly a big kid.
We have a lot of stock in Disney. We are very invested in the company in many ways, including the time share, annual passes, etc. etc. Something devastating happens to the company, so much for our financial security. That's why I am overjoyed when a brilliant Disney movie comes out, because it means that the company is still staying alive.
When Nemo came out I breathed a sigh of relief, because the company hadn't had a really great blockbuster since they stopped hand drawing.
When Disney and Pixar split up, I thought it was the end of the world.
When Michael Isner stepped down as CEO, I had my pitchfork ready for him. I've come to forgive him for all the horrible mistakes he made as CEO, but I still have some strong words for him if I were ever to meet him. Very strong words.
When Disney bought Pixar back at the end of last year for somewhere in the neighbourhood of 4 billion, I fainted, was roused by concerned friends, asked them if it was really true, and fainted again.
4... billion... dollars...
When I came to, and learned of all the movie plans Disney and Pixar had for the future, I was pleased, but still a little queasy.
So today, when I saw Wall-E, I was ecstatic. This movie is on the scale of Finding Nemo, which was extraordinary. I see Wall-E doing great things for this company, just like Nemo did. Nemo brought it back to life, hopefully Wall-E can give it that extra boost.
I definetly recommend seeing Wall-E, bring the kids, bring the friends, bring the whole bunch. Everyone will get something out of this movie, young and old. The soundtrack is very good too. It's a great, wholesome yet hilarious movie that I guarentee will be a Disney classic.
We have a lot of stock in Disney. We are very invested in the company in many ways, including the time share, annual passes, etc. etc. Something devastating happens to the company, so much for our financial security. That's why I am overjoyed when a brilliant Disney movie comes out, because it means that the company is still staying alive.
When Nemo came out I breathed a sigh of relief, because the company hadn't had a really great blockbuster since they stopped hand drawing.
When Disney and Pixar split up, I thought it was the end of the world.
When Michael Isner stepped down as CEO, I had my pitchfork ready for him. I've come to forgive him for all the horrible mistakes he made as CEO, but I still have some strong words for him if I were ever to meet him. Very strong words.
When Disney bought Pixar back at the end of last year for somewhere in the neighbourhood of 4 billion, I fainted, was roused by concerned friends, asked them if it was really true, and fainted again.
4... billion... dollars...
When I came to, and learned of all the movie plans Disney and Pixar had for the future, I was pleased, but still a little queasy.
So today, when I saw Wall-E, I was ecstatic. This movie is on the scale of Finding Nemo, which was extraordinary. I see Wall-E doing great things for this company, just like Nemo did. Nemo brought it back to life, hopefully Wall-E can give it that extra boost.
I definetly recommend seeing Wall-E, bring the kids, bring the friends, bring the whole bunch. Everyone will get something out of this movie, young and old. The soundtrack is very good too. It's a great, wholesome yet hilarious movie that I guarentee will be a Disney classic.
Thursday, June 26, 2008
The Missing Pieces
A little over a year ago (so sometime during my senior year of high school) one of my very best friends and orchestra mates left school, left town, and virtually disappeared. I didn't know he was leaving, I don't think anyone was really aware that he was going. One day he was there, happy, playing his viola, enjoying being a junior in high school. The next he was sad, clearly something was wrong. He talked about leaving. And then he was gone.
We didn't talk much. When we did talk, we used the medium of aim. I didn't see him in over a year though. He moved to Boston and unfortunately we couldn't coordinate a time/place to meet.
I talked to him tonight, on aim, for the first time in a while.
There are a lot of things I didn't know, that never even occurred to me.
He was kicked out of his house by his mother. Not just the typical teenage bull. No, his mother made him leave because he is bisexual, and she "hated" him for it.
He had to leave his little home town, suburbia USA and his wee little high school to conquer the big scary world all by himself.
He moved in with his boyfriend in Boston, whom he had met and dated since 2006, unbeknownst to most people. He got a job, signed up for and began attending an urban public school. He became vice president of his senior class and started two new clubs at the school. He got a job in a urban retail store and met a whole new variety of people than the kind you meet in small town USA. He loves his boyfriend, and it's clear that his boyfriend loves him too.
He's back in town now, after graduating from high school (as a member of National Honor Society, no less), being accepted to Boston University and most importantly reconciling with his mother. She realized, after a long enough time, that he is her son and that his happiness is of the uptmost. Isolating him from her will only be detrimental to her in the long run. I'm glad she realized that.
I am sad, and probably will be eternally sad, that he didn't tell me sooner. I would have been there. My mother who knows and loves him would have been there. Our mutual friends would have been there. We would have opened our doors to him in a heartbeat. Of course he has a place in my home, all he would have had to do is ask. Thankfully he made the most of this unfortunate situation, and he has become a stronger and better person for it. He has no hard feelings, he holds no grudge. He is living life to the fullest and enjoying ever second of it.
I could not be more proud of him, more overjoyed for him and his accomplishments. I'm sorry I couldn't have been there for him. I would, had I known.
It's why coming out it so important, and terrifying.
It's just terribly confusing and upsetting. I wish parents could just love their children no matter what. Embrace them no matter what they do, no matter who they are. Loving someone of the same gender is not the same as being an axe murderer or getting straight F's or coming home pregnant. We love someone. Be glad that we love at all.
We didn't talk much. When we did talk, we used the medium of aim. I didn't see him in over a year though. He moved to Boston and unfortunately we couldn't coordinate a time/place to meet.
I talked to him tonight, on aim, for the first time in a while.
There are a lot of things I didn't know, that never even occurred to me.
He was kicked out of his house by his mother. Not just the typical teenage bull. No, his mother made him leave because he is bisexual, and she "hated" him for it.
He had to leave his little home town, suburbia USA and his wee little high school to conquer the big scary world all by himself.
He moved in with his boyfriend in Boston, whom he had met and dated since 2006, unbeknownst to most people. He got a job, signed up for and began attending an urban public school. He became vice president of his senior class and started two new clubs at the school. He got a job in a urban retail store and met a whole new variety of people than the kind you meet in small town USA. He loves his boyfriend, and it's clear that his boyfriend loves him too.
He's back in town now, after graduating from high school (as a member of National Honor Society, no less), being accepted to Boston University and most importantly reconciling with his mother. She realized, after a long enough time, that he is her son and that his happiness is of the uptmost. Isolating him from her will only be detrimental to her in the long run. I'm glad she realized that.
I am sad, and probably will be eternally sad, that he didn't tell me sooner. I would have been there. My mother who knows and loves him would have been there. Our mutual friends would have been there. We would have opened our doors to him in a heartbeat. Of course he has a place in my home, all he would have had to do is ask. Thankfully he made the most of this unfortunate situation, and he has become a stronger and better person for it. He has no hard feelings, he holds no grudge. He is living life to the fullest and enjoying ever second of it.
I could not be more proud of him, more overjoyed for him and his accomplishments. I'm sorry I couldn't have been there for him. I would, had I known.
It's why coming out it so important, and terrifying.
It's just terribly confusing and upsetting. I wish parents could just love their children no matter what. Embrace them no matter what they do, no matter who they are. Loving someone of the same gender is not the same as being an axe murderer or getting straight F's or coming home pregnant. We love someone. Be glad that we love at all.
Wednesday, June 25, 2008
Shear Genius
So I didn't catch last season (although I did see some reruns recently) but I think I'm really gonna like this show.
Dee... very hott. I don't usually like, how should I say, scrawny lookin-girly girls. Well I guess she's not really a girly girl, but her clothes do match and she does seem to be well groomed. That's girly enough for me. Unless there is a permanent layer of dirt beneath her fingernails, she's a girly girl. I do her hair though. And I ADORE her enthusiasm!! She's such a cutie and she's always smiling and ready and rarin to go! She just has this way about her, she seems like such a sweetheart. I definetly have high hopes for her in this show. Waitta go mainstream lesbians! WOOT WOOT!
So back to reality.
They are almost done with the pool yard and it's looking really good. I'll take pictures and post them tomorrow most likely. My friends came over at 9 am and we hung around until around 11 waiting for the opportunity to put our hands in the cement. It was so worth getting up early and it looks ridiculously awesome!
I went to Lowes and got some plants and a clothesline, planted all the plants, did a buttload of yard work and am in the process of hanging up the new line. Tomorrow should be an equally busy day. I'm having a lot of fun outside and I'm planning on getting started on a new project in the very near future, either laying a new patio or building an arbour. This is what being unemployed and virtually care-free has done to me, I'VE BECOME A HANDYwoMAN!
Dee... very hott. I don't usually like, how should I say, scrawny lookin-girly girls. Well I guess she's not really a girly girl, but her clothes do match and she does seem to be well groomed. That's girly enough for me. Unless there is a permanent layer of dirt beneath her fingernails, she's a girly girl. I do her hair though. And I ADORE her enthusiasm!! She's such a cutie and she's always smiling and ready and rarin to go! She just has this way about her, she seems like such a sweetheart. I definetly have high hopes for her in this show. Waitta go mainstream lesbians! WOOT WOOT!
So back to reality.
They are almost done with the pool yard and it's looking really good. I'll take pictures and post them tomorrow most likely. My friends came over at 9 am and we hung around until around 11 waiting for the opportunity to put our hands in the cement. It was so worth getting up early and it looks ridiculously awesome!
I went to Lowes and got some plants and a clothesline, planted all the plants, did a buttload of yard work and am in the process of hanging up the new line. Tomorrow should be an equally busy day. I'm having a lot of fun outside and I'm planning on getting started on a new project in the very near future, either laying a new patio or building an arbour. This is what being unemployed and virtually care-free has done to me, I'VE BECOME A HANDYwoMAN!
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
Back Into My Head
I'm usually very content with my life and the way things are going, particularly now that I'm relatively happy in the decisions I make and have made in the recent past.
I'm very happy about my choice in college, my choice in majors, what I plan to do with my future, the friends I have made and retained, my relationships in my family, etc. Quitting my job made me kind of sad, but I hated it (I did quit, by the by...). I feel confident that I will be a productive member of society in whatever I pursue after college, after graduate school, etc.
I want to help LGBTQ teens/young adults, that's what I REALLY want to do. I just want to hug them all and tell them that it's really going to be okay. I wish someone had done that for me when I was 12, 14, 16. Thankfully I did have someone to literally hug me and tell me that it really was okay, which led to my coming out (for the most part). I also want to open up my own practice, and I won't overcharge people. I think there is a HUGE mental health crisis in this nation in particular that needs to be remedied. I'd like to help in any way I can.
But I very often find myself getting into a weird funk about being a big lez. I love myself. I took me a long time to get to the point where I could love myself, but I really do. But sometimes I wonder and get scared.
I'm scared that I'll never be able to find her. I'm scared that she doesn't exist, or that I'll find her too late in life. I'm scared that I don't open up my heart enough for her, so that even if I do find her, she won't know it's me, she won't know we're meant to be together. I've been hurt, really bad, and I'm over it emotionally, but I still have the "scars" to prove it so to speak. One of the scars is my reluctance to get too emotional.
I'm scared that I'll never be able to get married, when and if I do find her. We'll fall in love and live in a cozy house somewhere, and she'll have her job and I'll have mine, and we'll have a managerie of animals, but we'll never have the same rights as heterosexual couples. People will stare at us when we walk down the street holding hands. They'll never let us adopt or go through invetro, or those things will be too expensive. I fear that things just won't go our way.
I wonder if my family will accept me. I wonder if my family will accept my partner. I wonder if they'll say the cruel things about me that they do about other homosexuals, minorities, etc. I wonder if they will love me less.
I wonder if my pastor, if my church community, will accept me and will accept my partner. I am a religious person, and I love the community I have come to know. If they couldn't accept me, I don't know what I would do.
I'm just worried about all these things that I have absolutely no control over. I think the scariest aspect is that I am powerless, the people who love me and accept me are powerless. I just want everything to be okay. I can't be straight, I've tried so hard, but I just can't. I wish I felt like it was okay to be me. Usually I do, but when I get into moods like this I feel like it's never going to be okay ever again.
I'm very happy about my choice in college, my choice in majors, what I plan to do with my future, the friends I have made and retained, my relationships in my family, etc. Quitting my job made me kind of sad, but I hated it (I did quit, by the by...). I feel confident that I will be a productive member of society in whatever I pursue after college, after graduate school, etc.
I want to help LGBTQ teens/young adults, that's what I REALLY want to do. I just want to hug them all and tell them that it's really going to be okay. I wish someone had done that for me when I was 12, 14, 16. Thankfully I did have someone to literally hug me and tell me that it really was okay, which led to my coming out (for the most part). I also want to open up my own practice, and I won't overcharge people. I think there is a HUGE mental health crisis in this nation in particular that needs to be remedied. I'd like to help in any way I can.
But I very often find myself getting into a weird funk about being a big lez. I love myself. I took me a long time to get to the point where I could love myself, but I really do. But sometimes I wonder and get scared.
I'm scared that I'll never be able to find her. I'm scared that she doesn't exist, or that I'll find her too late in life. I'm scared that I don't open up my heart enough for her, so that even if I do find her, she won't know it's me, she won't know we're meant to be together. I've been hurt, really bad, and I'm over it emotionally, but I still have the "scars" to prove it so to speak. One of the scars is my reluctance to get too emotional.
I'm scared that I'll never be able to get married, when and if I do find her. We'll fall in love and live in a cozy house somewhere, and she'll have her job and I'll have mine, and we'll have a managerie of animals, but we'll never have the same rights as heterosexual couples. People will stare at us when we walk down the street holding hands. They'll never let us adopt or go through invetro, or those things will be too expensive. I fear that things just won't go our way.
I wonder if my family will accept me. I wonder if my family will accept my partner. I wonder if they'll say the cruel things about me that they do about other homosexuals, minorities, etc. I wonder if they will love me less.
I wonder if my pastor, if my church community, will accept me and will accept my partner. I am a religious person, and I love the community I have come to know. If they couldn't accept me, I don't know what I would do.
I'm just worried about all these things that I have absolutely no control over. I think the scariest aspect is that I am powerless, the people who love me and accept me are powerless. I just want everything to be okay. I can't be straight, I've tried so hard, but I just can't. I wish I felt like it was okay to be me. Usually I do, but when I get into moods like this I feel like it's never going to be okay ever again.
Another Weird Dream
I think something may be wrong with my sleeping habits, or maybe it's because my diet is weird since it's summer and I'm not eating the crap they serve us in the cafeteria that drains us of our souls. I have been having such weird dreams lately. Inexplicable weird dreams. They make very little sense and have next to nothing to do with the things that are on my mind at this point in time.
So I'll tell ya about what I dreamt of last night/this morning. I only ever remember the dreams I have in the few hours before I wake up, but I'm pretty sure I dream the entire night.
So the dream I had was just too weird for words. Really. There were a bunch of people somewhere, I assume it was earth but I could be completely incorrect. The people included me, my family, several of my friends from college, their families, their significant others (people whom I've never met and who I am relatively certain don't exist...), and a bunch of other people who I most likely made up.
In any event, wherever we were was being invaded by creatures from another world. If you've seen the Narnia movies they looked a lot like the goblins and witches/hags whatever. At one point in my dream, the most vivid point, we were all hauled up in a room, hiding out from the invaders. One of them knocked on the door, and of course being the polite person I am, the door opened for them (no different in dream land than in real life) and they stood in the doorway. It was like some deformed old hag with a creepy voice and all that jazz. She stood there, and very explicity asked for one of my friends, by name. I immediately stood up and said absolutely not, get out of here, started screaming at her and throwing her out. So she left, and everyone went back to doing whatever it was that they were doing. No one cared that I had just saved my friend's life, not even my friend. She was too busy doting over her much older boyfriend, who was old enough to be her father. I remember being very confused, and then waking up and being extremely confused.
I think it has something to do with the fact that this particular friend is thinking seriously about transferring. It would break my heart and many other hearts at school if she did. Someone needs to convince me that I can't save everybody, maybe then I can have normal dreams about puppies and kittens and clouds.
So I'll tell ya about what I dreamt of last night/this morning. I only ever remember the dreams I have in the few hours before I wake up, but I'm pretty sure I dream the entire night.
So the dream I had was just too weird for words. Really. There were a bunch of people somewhere, I assume it was earth but I could be completely incorrect. The people included me, my family, several of my friends from college, their families, their significant others (people whom I've never met and who I am relatively certain don't exist...), and a bunch of other people who I most likely made up.
In any event, wherever we were was being invaded by creatures from another world. If you've seen the Narnia movies they looked a lot like the goblins and witches/hags whatever. At one point in my dream, the most vivid point, we were all hauled up in a room, hiding out from the invaders. One of them knocked on the door, and of course being the polite person I am, the door opened for them (no different in dream land than in real life) and they stood in the doorway. It was like some deformed old hag with a creepy voice and all that jazz. She stood there, and very explicity asked for one of my friends, by name. I immediately stood up and said absolutely not, get out of here, started screaming at her and throwing her out. So she left, and everyone went back to doing whatever it was that they were doing. No one cared that I had just saved my friend's life, not even my friend. She was too busy doting over her much older boyfriend, who was old enough to be her father. I remember being very confused, and then waking up and being extremely confused.
I think it has something to do with the fact that this particular friend is thinking seriously about transferring. It would break my heart and many other hearts at school if she did. Someone needs to convince me that I can't save everybody, maybe then I can have normal dreams about puppies and kittens and clouds.
Monday, June 23, 2008
Yahd Work
They did demolition in my back yard today. They being the people who are going to be pouring/stamping concrete out there by the pool.
It doesn't look like it's going to be very nice. There really isn't enough room for the table and chairs we wanted to put out there. Like, not enough room at all.
Kind of upset about that.
I visited my roommate and my sister on Saturday. It was really nice seeing the roomie, I miss her a lot and wish we lived closer. It was also really nice seeing my sister and the kids. I love them a lot and really miss that I'm not around more often. I try to get out there as often as I can but it's really hard, particularly with gas the way it is.
I was supposed to go to my friend's party last night, and I really wanted to go, but she lives in MA, and not even that close to where my sister or my roommate live, and I just couldn't make the trip into a 3 day event. 1 day was hard enough in terms of driving and all that non sense. I do feel kind of left out, seeing as I live 2 hoursish away from school and most of my school friends live relatively close to school and each other.
September will get here soon enough I suppose. I'm not wishing summer away, by any stretch of the imagination. I'm just ready to go back and become a productive member of society again.
It doesn't look like it's going to be very nice. There really isn't enough room for the table and chairs we wanted to put out there. Like, not enough room at all.
Kind of upset about that.
I visited my roommate and my sister on Saturday. It was really nice seeing the roomie, I miss her a lot and wish we lived closer. It was also really nice seeing my sister and the kids. I love them a lot and really miss that I'm not around more often. I try to get out there as often as I can but it's really hard, particularly with gas the way it is.
I was supposed to go to my friend's party last night, and I really wanted to go, but she lives in MA, and not even that close to where my sister or my roommate live, and I just couldn't make the trip into a 3 day event. 1 day was hard enough in terms of driving and all that non sense. I do feel kind of left out, seeing as I live 2 hoursish away from school and most of my school friends live relatively close to school and each other.
September will get here soon enough I suppose. I'm not wishing summer away, by any stretch of the imagination. I'm just ready to go back and become a productive member of society again.
Sunday, June 22, 2008
Ick
I don't really want to talk about it, so I am going to blog about it, but not really.
Does that make any sense?
I just don't get it I guess. Is there really a need to pretend to be my friend when you treated me like shit? Is there?
We didn't date for very long by any stretch of the imagination. We sure as hell had enough ups and downs, and really it was doomed from the beginning.
It ended very messily.
Don't call me. Don't text me. Don't pretend to be my friend. We're not friends. I'll smile at you and be cordial, but I'm not your friend, I don't even want to be breathing the same air as you are.
So just leave me alone. We can be friendly, but let's not be friends. Let's just coexist.
Everytime I hear from you it sets me off, I get so mad, and then I get sad, and my head starts thinking so many thoughts that it feels like I'll explode. So just leave me alone, for my own good, and for yours too.
Other than that, I've got nothing. I wish I could say all these things to you, but I'm too nice. And a part of me still wants to be with you even though I know how much that would kill me. I never loved you, hell I've never loved anyone romantically. But I have felt strongly about people, and I did feel strongly about you. So let's just let go, and move on.
I feel a little better now, thank you bloggyness.
Does that make any sense?
I just don't get it I guess. Is there really a need to pretend to be my friend when you treated me like shit? Is there?
We didn't date for very long by any stretch of the imagination. We sure as hell had enough ups and downs, and really it was doomed from the beginning.
It ended very messily.
Don't call me. Don't text me. Don't pretend to be my friend. We're not friends. I'll smile at you and be cordial, but I'm not your friend, I don't even want to be breathing the same air as you are.
So just leave me alone. We can be friendly, but let's not be friends. Let's just coexist.
Everytime I hear from you it sets me off, I get so mad, and then I get sad, and my head starts thinking so many thoughts that it feels like I'll explode. So just leave me alone, for my own good, and for yours too.
Other than that, I've got nothing. I wish I could say all these things to you, but I'm too nice. And a part of me still wants to be with you even though I know how much that would kill me. I never loved you, hell I've never loved anyone romantically. But I have felt strongly about people, and I did feel strongly about you. So let's just let go, and move on.
I feel a little better now, thank you bloggyness.
Weird Dream
I had a weird dream last night/this morning. It was one of those wake-up dreams that you remember all about.
Well we, as in my mother and I, were in the Norway ride in Epcot in Disney. I don't really like the Norway ride, but I'll go on it if I'm forced to.
So we're on the ride, and it's really late at night so we're the only ones on our particular boat.
We get to one spot in the ride and all of a sudden the ceiling is A LOT closer to my head than it should be. Like my head is scraping against the ceiling, and the ceiling is only getting lower and lower. So I'm like "uh uh, no way, not going any further."
So then this chick hops out of her boat, wades through the water and pennies and shit to get to my boat. She pulls it along and I guess she magically makes the ceiling recede. So then my mom hops out of the boat and strikes up a conversation with this girl. She's really cute, she has blonde hair and she's well dressed. She said she just dropped out of seminary (uhm... weird) and wasn't sure where she was going from there.
I was still on the boat so I just floated merrily along. The mother and this girl were still talking and talking and talking. Finally I got to the end of the ride where there is this little movie type thing. The chick showed up, with my mother. This girl had, in the time since I had seen her, dyed her hair black and turned into a goth. My mom was not surprised at all, but apparently they became fast friends.
All I really remember from the end of my dream was taking the girl to the hospital because she was having a child, I assume it was our child because I kept calling her "honey." That's what married people do, right?
The weirdest thing was that the girl, my wife, whatever she was wanted to put trash in the car to take with us to the hospital. Like she was emptying the trash can into the car. I was just like "no, we can get the trash later" and she was like "no, we need it now."
I don't know what it means, but I think I'm having some internal psychological struggle that I am consciously unaware of.
Well we, as in my mother and I, were in the Norway ride in Epcot in Disney. I don't really like the Norway ride, but I'll go on it if I'm forced to.
So we're on the ride, and it's really late at night so we're the only ones on our particular boat.
We get to one spot in the ride and all of a sudden the ceiling is A LOT closer to my head than it should be. Like my head is scraping against the ceiling, and the ceiling is only getting lower and lower. So I'm like "uh uh, no way, not going any further."
So then this chick hops out of her boat, wades through the water and pennies and shit to get to my boat. She pulls it along and I guess she magically makes the ceiling recede. So then my mom hops out of the boat and strikes up a conversation with this girl. She's really cute, she has blonde hair and she's well dressed. She said she just dropped out of seminary (uhm... weird) and wasn't sure where she was going from there.
I was still on the boat so I just floated merrily along. The mother and this girl were still talking and talking and talking. Finally I got to the end of the ride where there is this little movie type thing. The chick showed up, with my mother. This girl had, in the time since I had seen her, dyed her hair black and turned into a goth. My mom was not surprised at all, but apparently they became fast friends.
All I really remember from the end of my dream was taking the girl to the hospital because she was having a child, I assume it was our child because I kept calling her "honey." That's what married people do, right?
The weirdest thing was that the girl, my wife, whatever she was wanted to put trash in the car to take with us to the hospital. Like she was emptying the trash can into the car. I was just like "no, we can get the trash later" and she was like "no, we need it now."
I don't know what it means, but I think I'm having some internal psychological struggle that I am consciously unaware of.
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