I Spy With My Little Eye

You know you're having a fantastic day when all you keep saying to yourself (in your head of course... because only crazy people TALK to themselves... geesh) is "I can't wait to blog about this." That's a bit o' sarcasm for ya, not because I don't love blogging about this that and the other thing, cause I really do, but because my day SUCKED and all I kept saying in my wee, exhausted brain was "soon we will be near a computer... then we will have revenge..."

If I could count on hands how many times I was on the verge of tears today, I would probably need four or five sets of hands. I'd only need one hand to count the number of times I actually did cry. That's a big deal for me, because I do not cry about little things. I remember each time in my life where I actually broke down and sobbed, and at this point I believe the count is five. Sure I've cried, a tear dribbles down my cheek.

Like the time when my friend had to physically remove me from my dorm building and take me for a walk while I explained to him, in the toughest way possible of course, that I needed to come out of the closet and that's why I was having a meltdown. Someone was doing a survey for a sociology class and one of the questions on the survey was "Would you consider yourself: Heterosexual, Homosexual, Bisexual, Unsure." I knew the person giving out the survey so I immediately checked off hetero. Right after I smilingly handed back the survey I started hitting walls, prompting my very good friend to bring me outside. We went for a walk around campus, it must have been 11 or 12 at night, not something terribly unusual for us. He asked me what was wrong and I got all sniffly and he said "Are you crying?" and I said "No!" and he said "Dude you're crying... weird." When I explained to him the situation he was understanding (I had told him several months prior) and told me to just get it over with. And here I am.

Back to the present, though. I went in to work at 10 am, ready to get my hands dirty and make some monehhh. My manager told me to stay on until 6... 6 pm... as in 6 at night, as in 1 hour before 7, 4 before 10, 13 before I would soon find out that I was required to go BACK into work. It was just me and the assistant manager working all day, me driving her COMPLETELY insane because today was literally my second day on the job and I'm still learning. I don't handle hostility very well at all. If someone yells at me, I shut down and the job won't get done. For example, if someone told me to rewrite a paper cause it was completely incorrect, I would stare blankly into space until they provided constructive criticism or until my brain rewired the motherboard and I was able to blink again.

The woman I was working with soon caught on to the fact that it really was my second day, I really never have worked in fast food before, my only previous job was with small children, and that I am sensitive and quiet. I'll do whatever you want me to do, just please first tell me how to do it in a constructive and positive way. By the end of the day we were getting along fine, but for a while I was afraid she was going to beat me, and I could tell she was afraid she was going to make me cry. I'm sure it's odd for people who see me to find out that yes, I really do have a heart and yes, I do very often wear it on my sleeve (on the inside of the sleeve, apparently).

At one point I had to go out and scrub the outside of the drive thru because someone clearly ran over a ketchup packet. As I was standing there, bucket of suds in hand, visor tipped upward and slightly to the right, baggy kahki pants smeared with various condiments and rouge beverage spills I watched as the cars drove past, one by one, each stopping at the window where my coworker took their orders. I had to wait until I had a good opened so I could get in and scrub. Then... oh then... and my heart skips a beat here... I saw her. She was in a white pick up truck, with silver trim, I'm thinking it was a Ford. She had cute brown hair cut dykishly short. It's how I knew, besides the fact that she drove a pickup truck, and besides the fact that she could tell I was a fellow dyke. Why else would she give me the stare down for the whole 2:00 that she was in the drive thru? I grinned and blushed a little and looked down at my feet and then back up at her. She smiled and continued staring at me (how awkward, I know, but I was very flattered) and I walked inside to go help my coworker do orders. I made sure she got a good look at my swagger as I walked in. Oh yeah, I swagger all right. I kept chuckling to myself, thinking "I spy with my little eye something... gay." Make your own entertainment. I sure hope mizz pick up truck comes back for another iced coffee sometime soon, I'll be sure to put a little extra sugar in her order.

That reminds me of the time, earlier this semester, that my roommate and I got up early on a Sunday morning to go out for coffees. We had been to this particular dunkin donuts (happens to be in Burlington, MA) a few weeks previously when we went to see a movie out there. There are probably about 30 dunkin donuts between our school and Burlington, but we had to go back there. There was this girl there, so cute, so nice, greatest smile ever, who was really nice to us and yeah, I had to hotts for her (welcome to my life), and my roommate, in her never ending quest to get me laid, decided that I should pursue her. So we went on this particular Sunday, hoping that she was working. And lo!! She was working.

I held the door for an older gentlemen who, upon entering the store, said "I knew a nice young Irish girl would hold the door for me!" I smiled, and he looked at my roommate and said "Two Irish sisters!" (because she does look Irish, and we could probably pass for sisters if you didn't look too hard) to which my roommate said "No no no, we're not sisters and I'm not Irish," and sh proceeded to give him the run down of her ancestry. He was clearly very impressed with our social skills, because he offered to buy our breakfasts. My roomate was quick to ask for a medium iced coffee, I got a small (after much protest). He then asked that I order my breakfast and I absolutely refused, so he went on his merry way, and we were ecstatic to have made a new friend. I order my toasted cinnamin raisin bagel with cream cheese on the side and had a seat by the window the consume said bagel, after making oogly eyes at the girl behind the counter who took my order. My roommate was sitting across from me, staring at me, with her head resting on both of her hands in loose fists. "What?" I said, a little nervous that she was going to turn on the laser beams in her eyes or something. And then it hit me. The girl behind the counter didn't ask for any money!! I said this outload, quietly, to my roommate, who simply nodded and said "I was waiting for you to realize it." Oh I was SOOO happy. It literally was one of the best days of my life. The girl came out from behind the counter and talked to us for a while, told us her hours, and asked us to come back and visit her again soon. I couldn't even wait to visit her. She became known as "muffin lady" to all my friends who heard this legendary story. Unfortunately, I haven't seen muffin lady since that day, after several attempts to catch her on the hours she told us to visit. Someday I'll find her, and whisk her away, and we can eat bagels and drink iced coffees forever and ever.

So that was my day (and a recap of several days in the not too distant past). I have to be in to work at 7 am tomorrow morning (soooooooo painful for me...) but I am leaving at noon and then packing and then going to DISNEY WORLD bright and early Saturday morning, where I'm sure I'll fall in love with more women (I fall in love everywhere I go, I think of it as a gift more than a curse) take some pictures with some lifesized mice, see some fireworks, drink a lot with my mom and try to forget about how much I really would rather be spending my summer sleeping, basketballin, swimming and being a general hoodlum. That's it for me, peace out girlscouts!!

P to the S: If you read my blog I would absolutely LOVE it if you would comment, or subscribe or something of that nature. I'm super new to blogging but I love it and I'd love feedback :-D Thanks in advance!!